


Concrete Angel

by WinterRepublic



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Crossover, F/M, M/M, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2009-07-27
Updated: 2012-11-21
Packaged: 2017-11-19 04:07:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 14,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/568900
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WinterRepublic/pseuds/WinterRepublic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sirius held Harry for what was supposed to be the last time that night. Bared down with the blame of the Potters’ death, he runs to the only "family" he has left…Billy Black...In Forks, Washington USA.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Like A Bird

**Author's Note:**

> **Warning(s):** Grand timeline changes. Please don't bother me with it. Yes, I know the timeline is wrong, but I manipulated it for a reason. Jacob will still be two years younger than Bella but Harry will be one year younger than Bella and a little less than half a year older than Jacob instead of five years older than Bella and seven older than Jacob should it be cannon. There will be some abuse and character death. So be forewarned. I might change the genre later, but I really don't know where I'm going with this at the moment.

  
**x.X.x**

~*~*~*~ **Like a Bird** ~*~*~*~

**x.X.x**

 

_x.X.x …Like a bird…like a bird… x.X.x_  


He stood in a daze.

His hair whipped around his head in a broken halo. It was as if the world just stopped her spinning and let all the winds she left behind catch up. How'd he end up here? Tears found their way to the eyes already lined with lines of laughter and smiles; now lined with weariness and sadness. He knew that he could be stronger, but he didn't want to be strong tonight.

The night was flaxen like the dust kicked up after a storm or childish tumbling on the dirty ground. The ruins of a once beautiful house stood imperiously before the yellowed clouds; burning with a passion that no man could ever recreate alone. The flames roared with a brazen vigor; whispering the sounds of past laughter into the blackened sky; taking with it, the life of those who lasted not nearly long enough.

The Aurors had arrived. The Order had come. It was all in vain as the ground shook with a force great enough to bowel even the sturdiest man to the ground. The second floor of the once beautiful white house had collapsed. People were yelling and screaming out orders. A hand landed on Sirius' shoulder and shoved him forward. He couldn't hear what they were telling him. The flames were slowly dying; their dance slowing to small bursts with the wind.

A light flashed and there was James standing in the doorway, waving at him to come inside. The house looked like it always had. The outside was a pearly white and the front hall was a soft slate yellow-gray. The wooden floors shined with the light reflecting off of them. Lily always kept her house spotless. She always liked the shine that the muggle way of cleaning left behind. It was something she would never give up, just like cooking. In the background he could see Lily standing there with little Harry, waving at him. Harry was smiling, his green eyes glittering with happiness. Another flash and it faded.

"Move it Black! Check for any survivors!"

Sirius felt as if he had gained a before-denied access to his limbs and was propelled forward with the command. There had to be someone alive in here! James was a trained Auror and Lily…well Lily could hold her own in a duel. They couldn't be dead, they would never—! Lily was a monster when it came to Harry's safety. Voldemort would have been the one who was running away in fear. Anyway, Lily was training to become a Healer.

Pulling at fallen wood, Sirius felt something cut into his hand. The pain just refused to register in his head as he continued to dig through the rubble. Jagged rocks were pulled from their places and splintery wood was yanked from their hiding. Sirius could hear someone speaking to him and from the corner of his eye he could see Albus standing there with Remus. His werewolf friend was saying something to him. Something about blood…Sirius ignored him and continued to dig frantically.

"James! Lily!" Somebody was yelling…was that him? He sounded so far away…

"Sirius," Remus grabbed hold of the bloodied hands, "They're gone Siri…James and Lily are gone."

Sirius pulled his hands from Remus' grasp and continued to plow through the mess, "Harry! What about Harry?!"

Yanking out a plank of fallen wood, Sirius heard a creaking sound. A gust of dusty air blew into his face. Yes! There had to be some sort of space in there! If there was even a small chance of Harry living, he wouldn't let it fly from his grasp. A small baby blue blanket came into view only moments later. It was shredded, a long strip of it leading under the unstable, precariously sitting cave.

"Harry…?" A small cry answered him, "Here!" Sirius called, "He's here!"

Blue robed Aurors surrounded the spot and began casting safe spells. Remus gently tugged Sirius away from the small opening, giving the Aurors a chance to extract the boy safely. He pulled Sirius into his arms, tucking the dirt matted head beneath his chin as the taller man slumped in relief and sadness.

"He's alive," Sirius whispered, "He's alive."

Remus didn't answer his friend and closed his eyes. Instead he held him tighter in some sense that maybe if he held him like this, then this would all be a dream and when he opened his eyes, everything would go back to being normal. Sirius was no killer. He didn't betray the Potters. He couldn't—wouldn't—believe that. All the signs pointed to Sirius as the culprit though and this hurt more than the werewolf would admit. He believed in Sirius, but it was so hard to refute the facts that were stacked against him.

"Got 'im!" Hagrid's booming voice echoed across the lot.

The sound of the small area caving in followed these words. Remus held tighter to Sirius, preventing him from turning to the sound. He trembled in the werewolf's arms, letting Remus know just what he was thinking.

"He's fine."

"I want to see him…"

Before Remus could protest, Sirius had pulled away from him and had caught sight of Harry; his beautiful, gorgeous, godson. Sirius moved forward to get to Harry. Aurors surrounded the man, newly named convict, and restrained his hands, snatching his wand away.

"What's going on?!" Sirius whipped his head to look back at Remus who refused to meet his eyes, "Moony…?"

An Auror drew Sirius' attention when he began to speak, "Sirius Black, you have been charged with the murders of one James Potter and one Lillian Potter nee Evans. The penalty, by law, is a life sentence in Azkaban Prison."

"What?!" Sirius struggled, breaking free of the Aurors' hold. He managed one arm free, blasting the other with stray, uncontrollable magic from his free hand, "Albus?" Dumbledore turned away, pretending not to hear his name be called, "Look at me Albus!"

Dumbledore turned just as Sirius caught up to his stride. "Mr. Black."

"I didn't do it Albus. You know I didn't do it!" Sirius raged.

"I…I cannot dissuade their decision. I have already tried."

"So you're willing to let them throw me into prison without a trial? A trial that already happened before this even took place?!"

"Now, Sirius," the Headmaster chided, "You must understand…"

Sirius' shoulders slumped. He knew. Dumbledore knew. Dumbledore knew that something would happen and still…and still he would allow Sirius to rot in Azkaban. Then…what would happen to Harry; his beautiful little Harry? The only relatives that any of them had that would take in the boy were dead. Lily had family even if it was only her sister Petunia.

The thing that skewed that picture was that Petunia hated anything and everything that had to do with her sister Lily. She would most definitely not accept a child of Lily's womb that could possibly have extracted Lily's…what had she called it…freakishness? Sirius could already imagine the horrors that she and her family would put Harry through. Surly this wasn't where Albus planned to send Harry?

"Give him to me."

"Sirius?"

"Just…give him to me."

Albus looked over at the devastated man in worn blue Auror robes. Instead of charging after Pettigrew like Albus knew he wanted—like Albus wanted—he had stayed behind to dig through the ruins to find his godson of only barely a year. His hands were bloodied and shaking, testament to the digging he had done to find the boy.

Hagrid was looking uneasily at Sirius. He was one of the many who thought that Sirius had betrayed the Potters, but who, besides Sirius himself, was there to refute that fact? The only people who would have known for sure were already dead. Eying the broken man once again, Dumbledore nodded his head to Hagrid.

Let Sirius hold the child.

This would be the last chance he'd ever get to do so.

_x.X.x …Like an island you can't reach…. x.X.x_

Bright green eyes stared up at Sirius through Lily's lashes. Dust settled on the soft wild locks of James' hair, brushing it a light brownish color. The rosy color of Lily's cheeks was smudged lightly with the dirt from the air. Lily's lips formed a bubbly smile beneath a mixture of her and James' nose. Harry had a nose all his own. Sirius' hand curled around Lily's fingers; the hand Harry had wrapped around his finger. Smiling, Sirius leaned down to kiss the soft skin.

"You look just like James and Lily Beautiful-gorgeous." Harry gurgled happily, "Yes, I know, but I got to leave you…with Dumbledore…" As if sensing Sirius' sadness like his own, Harry began to whine and Sirius briefly wondered if Harry attached himself to Sirius as a baby to a mother. Tucking the small body to his chest, Sirius began to tell Harry a story.

"You know, your mother was an awful cook; James old me often enough. He used to tell me that the only person who got food 'fit for a king' was you. Lily would always warm your milk to perfection, often leaving dinner to overcook or in some cases: burn. Maybe it was just me, but I believe he was exaggerating to some extent. She was bad, but not that bad…She was so good with you Harry. I don't think I've ever seen her so happy since the day you came out of her belly."

Harry's tiny fingers curled into Sirius' robes and hair, gently pulling, "Pa'foo'?"

Chuckling, Sirius untangled the hand in his hair, "I often told Lily that I would take you somewhere far away one day to meet the 'sane' part of my family. I promised her: this Christmas, I'd take her to meet them. James would tag along just for the ride. He had his hands full with protecting you, you know. He loved you that much…We came up with the passports and everything. We were going to go by muggle transportation so that no one from the Wizarding World would be able to track us. You know, 'once a wizard, think like a wizard for all time?' Well…I guess that was more of what Lily thought, but I'm not saying that it was wrong. Lily was a brilliant witch. "

The tiny hands reached up again, this time to pat Sirius's cheek. Harry babbled out some nonsense that Sirius couldn't understand but, for a moment, he could almost swear that Harry was telling him something important. Perhaps it was the Black inbreeding that led him to believe it…or maybe he was just too depressed to care.

"I can't understand a word you're saying," Sirius chuckled softly, "would you care to elaborate?"

For a moment, Harry looked just like an indignant Lily. He had the most adorable pout on his face, although Sirius would never mention this out loud to anyone. The yawn that was produced ruined the indignant look on the tiny baby and the breath tickled some of the hair on the older man's face. This made Sirius smile.

In a short distance, only the Order members who know what was going on had stayed behind. That left only Severus, Remus, Dumbledore, Minerva and Hagrid. The Aurors that would take Sirius into custody were standing at a distance, setting up a perimeter presumably, if Sirius tried to escape. Although Sirius might try to escape, the run-down man looked anything but strong enough to escape—not one to twenty fully trained Aurors.

Hagrid shuffled restlessly. The groundskeeper really didn't know the full story, he just knew that he had to take Harry and take him to the location that Dumbledore planned. He was kind of disappointed that Sirius would betray his closest friend. He'd known James and Sirius in school and the two were inseparable…how could Sirius ever do such a thing? Just looking at the way Sirius was holding Harry and whispering to the child made Hagrid wish he could rethink taking the baby away though. Harry was, after all, supposed to go to Sirius should anything happen to the Potters. It wasn't really fair that Sirius didn't get a trial, but it wasn't his place to go against Dumbledore.

Both Minerva and Severus, surprisingly, were adamant about Albus taking the child away from Sirius. It wasn't that Severus suddenly grown to like the Black, but he really didn't see why the boy, Lily's son, had to be taken away and given to muggles. He knew firsthand how horrible muggles could be to magical children, especially when it came down to Lily's sister. Minerva was just really a stickler for the rules. She knew for a fact that Sirius had not betrayed the Potters. He was stupid, but he was not that stupid. After all of her years teaching him, she knew that he would rather die for his friends than give them away. She hated the fact that an innocent man was going to be thrown in jail and that Harry would go to horrible people.

Remus glanced at Dumbledore briefly before returning his gaze back to his longtime friend. He didn't know whether to believe Sirius or Dumbledore for the man never led him astray. Sirius was gently chatting with Harry like the baby was actually forming sentences and talking back. It was cute and sad at the same time. It showed how much he loved his godson and it also showed how hard it was on the man to let him go. Remus had grown up with Sirius. He'd known the boy come man since they were eleven. How had things gone so far downhill?

"Take Harry, Remus. It is time."

The werewolf felt his heart clench at those words. Had it really come down to this? Was there no other way? Remus didn't answer as his feet began to move of their own accord. If Padfoot was innocent, then surly it would have some to light before all of this, right? It could not have been anyone else. James didn't trust anyone else that much—Sirius was like his other half.

Remus's feet carried him till he was standing right next to Sirius and one babbling Harry. His chest constricted when he heard the half-conversation, "Sirius."

For a man who has never cried so much in his life, Sirius sure had a lot of tears right now. In fact, he had more than enough to share for him and Harry both, "I don't want to Moony…he's all I've got left…"

"It has to be done Padfoot. You're a convicted murderer…" Remus spoke the last words with a heavy heart, "Harry cannot stay with you."

"I-I can't…" Sirius buried his sobs in Harry's small, soft tummy.

Harry whimpered and softly slapped his hands against Sirius's head, "Ma no…ti…"

"I'm so sorry Harry," Sirius hugged the babe tighter, "I'm so sorry!"

Almost as if Harry knew, he began to wail, "No bai!"

Remus reached out to take Harry from Sirius's relaxed grip when Sirius decided to suddenly tighten his hold and turn away, "Please…Moony, just…just give me a few more minutes….I just need a few more minutes…"

"I can't do that Sirius. Harry has to go now." He took a deep breath, "You…you have to go now."

"No bai! Ma bai!" Harry waved his little fists into the air.

"I'm sorry…I'm so sorry…" Sirius half-sobbed, half-mumbled, "I couldn't save you…"

Harry's feet kicked at Moony's hands as he reached forward again. Didn't he understand? Sirius needed him! "Moo'y…no…moo'y no…"

"I'm so sorry that I couldn't protect you…"

In all of his years, Remus Lupin had never quite felt so hurt. While it wasn't by the actions of Sirius, or the magical injuries, it was by his own actions. While reaching out to Harry once more, a magical surge as big as the one that brought down the Potters house, was let loose—enough to level the entire village of Godric's Hollow.

The Aurors had looked ahead and set a perimeter, but weren't really prepared for what had happened next. It prevented Sirius from escaping…and it also prevented the release of pure magic from escaping. The only ones left standing were Sirius and Remus.

Said werewolf looked around at the devastation around himself. The man that was once his best friend was standing with a whimpering Harry cradled to his chest. Remus honestly couldn't tell you what he wanted anymore had anyone asked. At that moment, instead of seeing a man and child, he saw a desperate soul holding onto its last strand of hope. Sirius turned away from Remus and began to walk away.

Lupin lifted his wand in a shaky hand and fired off a random spell. He wasn't sure that it hit, but with that spell, it felt like the last of his magic left him. Truly, Sirius Black was a strong man to have done what he did… and Lupin found that couldn't even have stopped this battered soul if he wanted to.

"I'm…so sorry…I couldn't protect you…"

There was nothing but the wind to answer his hushed whisper and suddenly, the world went black...

_x.X.x …I know I'm stronger than you think… x.X.x_

William Black.

He found the number in an old leather bound book that was stashed away in his old potion's room at Grimmuld Place. Tucked away in a small corner, Sirius pulled out a phone. This was one of the many skeletons in the Black family closet. He didn't mind it so much since it was rather convenient right now. Better than risking Gringotts or muggle streets alone anyway. The Blacks were a narcissistic and twisted family with dark secrets that would very well break them down.

"Alright men! Spread out! You four: go check upstairs! The rest of you: check the ground floor and below; he couldn't have gotten that far!"

He tucked Harry tightly to his chest. He was glad that Harry knew the importance of being quiet at the moment, since he hadn't made a peep since they had apparated away. Above them, footsteps and voices clearly rang out. It must be the Aurors or the Order. It didn't really matter, either way he would find himself in Azkaban if either of them found him. He just wanted to protect his baby more than anything.

Yes. Harry was his now. He couldn't exactly tell you when the thought struck him, but it did. And he wasn't ready to give it up. Call it the Black insanity from too much inbreeding if you will. Call it depression or guilt, but it didn't matter at all now. Harry was his and he wasn't going to give him up. Harry was his son now. Sirius believed this so much that he could almost envision himself giving birth to Harry.

"You three: check the basement! I want every millimeter of this place combed for that traitor!"

Sirius breathed in Harry's sweet baby sigh as he held the receiver up to his ear. He dialed in the eleven numbers from the page he ripped from the book. He made sure it was a clean tear so no one could track him. Still, he decided to incendio the book to eliminate the fact that they would ever get their hands on it.

Three rings were all it took before the phone was answered. The voice on the other side was groggy and rough, like the person had just woken from a restless nap. Sirius could also hear a baby whimpering in the background.

"Hello?"

For a moment, Sirius wasn't quite sure what to say. So long had it been since the last time he heard that voice. So long it had been since he saw the face that matched the voice. What should he say? How would the voice react?

"Hello? I'm going to hang up…"

"Wait…please…" Sirius whispered.

"What? Who is this?" Came the gruff reply.

Sirius forced a broken chuckle, "You don't remember me Billy?"

"Who is this? What do you want? I don't want—!"

"Surely even you can place my voice. After all, you used to tease me about it mercilessly whenever I went to visit."

A long pause and a bit of shuffling was heard on the other end of the line, "Hmm…Sirius…? Sirius you old sod! I haven't heard from you in a long time! How's it been? How is England?"

"I…Bill—" Sirius swallowed the lump in his throat as his voice cracked.

"Sirius? What's wrong? You sound awful."

What could he say? That he was a convict on the run? That some madman tried to send his son to deplorable muggles? Sirius let out a choked sob.

"I…they—they're gone Billy…!"

"Who—your friends?"

"I don't know what to do! I didn't do it—you have to believe me…I didn't do it…"

"What? Boy, you've got to calm down; I don't even know what you're talking about!"

"I didn't do it…I tried…I really did…but they're gone now…"

"Are you talking about that man you brought with you the last time you visited?"

"They're going to take him away…I've got to go now…they're going to take him away…"

"Dammit! Now hold on a minute Sirius Orion Black—!"

The rest of the sentence was cut as Sirius put down the phone. He cast a light sleeping charm over Harry and pulled the blanket over his head. He looked at the paper in his hand once more and committed the address to memory. He cast a small incendio on the paper and set it down next to the phone. Casting another spell at the phone, he reached over and clutched a portkey tightly to himself and Harry.

He waited.

A small click on the other side alerted Billy to the cut connection. He held the phone for a few more minutes before he replaced the receiver back into the cradle. Something terrible must have happened to cause his cousin to break like this. Never had he heard the man sound so bad in his life. Not even when Sirius was laid out with the Wizard's Flu could you hear his laughter stop ringing. What could have happened to cause the man to fall so hard?

A small tug on his pant leg pulled him from his musings. He looked down and spotted his son all covered in a sweet-smelling, sticky goo. As he picked the overactive child up he smiled, "Let's go find out whatever they gave you this time, hm?"

_x.X.x …Like a bird or an island you can't reach… x.X.x_

He was sitting on his front porch having a smoke when it happened. A sudden flash; gone as quickly as it had come and a body falling straight to the ground. Now, Billy Black wasn't an overly suspicious man, but when it came to someone arriving like that on his property, then he had found every right to be.

Only wizards and witches ever arrived by portkey. The telltale crack of apparation was not heard, so he could only assume that a portkey is what it was. But wizards never kept up with their squibs, so who could have landed not half a mile from his house?

Billy rose from where he sat when the body made no further moves since it hit the ground. He thought about Sirius's phone call earlier that day and quickly made his way over. Could it be? But why? What happened to drive that man this far? When he entered the tall grass, he searched the grounds…but nothing was there.

Turning back, Billy went inside.

Sirius rolled over and threw off the old cloak covering himself and Harry. Harry had not woken at their departure and still slept during their arrival. The ragged man sighed. Harry's face was bunched up in discomfort as he slept. Standing, Sirius felt a wave of dizziness sweep over him. Maybe he used too much magic back at Godric's Hollow…

Moving unsteadily over the terrain, Sirius trekked up to the small house that he remembered from his childhood. It was red and black with a white porch on the front and a smaller one out back. The house was small, too small for all of them to live comfortably, but if anything, Sirius had to get Harry in there—where it was safe. No matter what.

Leaning heavily against the door jamb, he knocked. It took a while, but a light flickered on in the window by him and the door opened. Tuscan, sun-kissed skin came into view. He followed the arms, chest, shoulders and raven black hair to a very familiar face.

The person in the doorway dropped whatever he had in his hand and stumbled forward. He couldn't believe his eyes. The man looked so worn for wear. His hair was matted with dirt and god knows what else. The robes he wore, for that's what they were, were torn asunder and hung in shambles here and there on the bruised and bloodied form.

The baby in the man's arms looked dirty, but unharmed save for the deep cut on its forehead. The tiny face was scrunched in discomfort but nothing else looked out of place. The arms around the babe tightened and Billy raised his eyes back towards the haggard face of the man on his front porch. The man swayed a little.

"…Sirius?"

"Billy…I…"

"Well? Get inside this house boy! You'll catch your death out there!"

x.X.x

**TBC**

x.X.x


	2. Unknown Soldier

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Chapter Specific Warning(s):** Minor time-jumps occur. This chapter is dark. I admit that the whole story has some elements, but relative to this chapter specifically. Mild abusive situations and mental development challenges are present. Character death ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **A/N:** LATE. Yeah, this took a while in coming. Honestly, there was a lot that I wanted to put in this chapter, but it wouldn't all fit. I had to edit a lot and take out quite a bit, but overall I think this chapter went well. In hindsight, I should have left a few things out until the next chapter, but I couldn't resist.  
>  This chapter will be very disjointed and it may be confusing to some of you. I'm sorry, but it was written like this for a reason. I had to basically skip over the times where nothing of importance really happened. So, only the important events of Harry's childhood are highlighted here.  
>  **I'm very flattered that so many people have taken a liking to this story. Really, I am.** I couldn't believe how much my inbox had gotten flooded with your alerts and reviews. I think I cried a little and got all big headed. I think I had danced for joy because I swear my mum called me crazy in that short span. Thank you, thank you, thank you~3

  
**x.X.x**

~*~*~*~* **Unknown Soldier** *~*~*~*~

**x.X.x**  


_x.X.x …border line…dead inside… x.X.x_

Something was not right.

_"Remus! Oh, god, Moony…I-I'm sorry…I'm so sorry! It wasn't me!"_

"Now, now, my boy. It's over and done. We need to—"

"Please don't send me to Azkaban! I swear to Merlin that it wasn't me!"

"Silence you pest! That'll be the only place that'll take you!"

"Severus!"

"How could you do this?!"

Brows knitted together in confusion.

_"Remus! Oh, god, Remus…I swear it wasn't me…" ___

There it goes again. Was he dreaming?

"Lupin."

Remus opened his eyes to find himself in an obscure room at Hogwarts. Something itched at his subconscious, telling him that something about this placement was not right. He didn't know what it was exactly, but then again, he didn't even remember how or why he had come to be in an infirmary in the first place.

"Nice to see you finally grace us with your ungainly presence."

"Now see here Severus!"

Those respectively sneering and chastising voices sounded so familiar and sure enough, when Remus turned to the owners of those voices, he came face to face with Snape and McGonagall. The old Headmistress didn't even have a slight twinkle in those dull eyes.

"Minerva…Severus…" Remus croaked. The other man rolled his eyes and thrust a glass under Remus's nose. Accepting it kindly he continued, "What happened?"

Snape glared at Remus, "You don't remember?"

Lupin closed his eyes, "I…no…I don't think so…"

"What's the last thing you remember then?"

"I…" Remus scratched his chin, "I saw Sirius…he kept scratching his arm. He was saying something about James and Lily." Everything clicked, "Oh, god, James…Lily...Sirius! Sirius and Harry! Where's Harry?!"

Severus stared at the distraught man on the bed hard. In just a few short moments, he had lost everything—his friends—family and even his pseudo-godson. He almost felt sorry for Remus at that moment. Almost.

"Black took the boy and disappeared."

"What?"

"You heard me. After Black let loose his magic, he fled the country."

"He…Minerva?"

The witch who was quiet up until then couldn't look him in the eye. She smiled kindly at him but it didn't reach even halfway to her tired-looking eyes.

"It's true I'm afraid."

"But he couldn't have gotten far! We could—"

"He did well to cover his tracks so even if he did used any magical means at all, we could never find it."

"What do you mean? He used muggle ways to escape?"

"We're not sure, but we're betting everything on it that he did."

"Lily was the only muggleborn he knew. She wouldn't have conspired with him on anything like this—ways to escape I mean."

"They didn't have to necessarily be used to escape, but it could have aided him in the escape."

"But Sirius wouldn't think about it like that."

Snape snorted, "My sentiments exactly."

"What about Grimmuld?" Remus ignored the jibe.

"We anticipated he'd go there too, but it was empty."

"But Grimmuld—it's the only place he'd go to…"

"We sent Aurors, Remus."

"And you couldn't find a single trace of magic?"

"None."

"Why didn't you go? Or someone of the Order? You know his magic enough to distinguish it in that old house!"

McGonagall refused to meet his eyes as she answered, "The whole complex was burnt to the ground. There were no survivors."

Remus was breathing heavily by now, "Then what about the trial? James…?"

"Well," Minerva turned to leave, "We caught a rat if that is what you wish to know."

The werewolf stared after the woman in confusion, "A rat? What is she talking about?"

Snape sighed disgustedly, causing Lupin to start. He had almost forgotten the other man was still there. Snape just glared at the wolf.

"We caught Pettigrew by sheer luck after Black got away. He was to be tried the moment you awakened. Now that you've finally gotten yourself together, the Headmaster wishes to see you."

Snape stood to leave just as Poppy came out of her office with some potions in her hands. Remus took each potion without complaint as he stared after the dour man. He knew no matter how nasty Severus may be he would never lie to Remus—not when the truth hurt so much more. Was Sirius innocent? What had Peter done?

**o0o**

The trip to the Headmaster's office was a long and tedious one. Remus clasped his hands behind his back and pondered everything he'd picked up from those past few days and hours. Everything had gone downhill so fast.

Wormtail was the traitor. He had to be. Oh, god. And Sirius tried to tell him too. Then, why didn't the Potters trust him enough to know? Sure, there was a greater risk, but knowing would be better in situations like this. At that point, you only believed what you're told.

It's not like there was anything documenting that they had appointed a new secret keeper. If they had left something, it would all have been lost to the magical fire or destroyed when the house collapsed. This was something beyond anything that they could have foreseen.

Remus thought back to the day before. Was there any sign that this was going to happen? There had to have been something pointing to this. Even Voldemort couldn't have done something so unpredictable and crazy. This was not like him. Sure a prophesy had been made, but Voldemort didn't believe in those. So then why…? What made him do what he did?

Nothing was out of the ordinary. Earlier that day, Wormtail had stopped by to question after his wellbeing. The poor man seemed to have been spooked out his mind. Remus had chalked it up to war. Sirius had come to speak with him closer to the evening. He was a bit jumpy, but, again, this was war, he had every right to be.

The entrance to the Headmaster's office loomed in his vision.

"Ah, Remus, so nice of you to join us. Please, have a seat."

There were a lot of people crowded into the office. Moody and a few Aurors including but not limited to Tonks, Shacklebolt and a few nameless faces were there. Arthur Weasley and his wife Molly were both there as was Bones and a few other recognizable faces. Peter Pettigrew was among this group as well, despite his very different reasons for being so. He even saw Alice Longbottom standing with her mother over in the corner holding her son Neville.

It pinched the wolf's heart to not see Lily there doing the same thing.

Albus stood once Remus took a seat, "Now that everyone who could make it is here, I'd like to take this time to go over a few things." He wasted no time in breaking the news, "Frank Longbottom and the Potters have been murdered."

"Are you sure Albus?"

"What?!"

"How many times have you checked?"

"No! You've got to be lying!"

"Please tell me this isn't true!"

"And 'Arry? What about 'Arry?

"I won't believe it until I see their bodies!"

"Their son Albus? What happened to their son?"

Cries and shouts burst forth from every corner of the room. Even the ones who were on the scene looked pressed to accept what they had been there to partially witness. The Potters were such good people and Frank was an irreplaceable man. Albus raised a hand to quiet the room. It still amazed people how he could silence a room with no words at all.

"Their locations were under fidelus which means that their locations were given away by a traitor. At the time we erected the wards, the secret keeper was Sirius Black." A few whispers broke out in the small crowd, "What we all did not know was that they had changed the keeper at the last minute. It was changed to Peter Pettigrew."

"The boy Albus! What happened to the boy!"

Everyone was so intent on questioning Albus and the other Order members who had been there that they didn't notice as Moody set his sights on Alice. They all cringed at the sudden malice and disgust rolling from his lips as he snapped at the woman.

"Is this true?"

The woman flinched and held her son closer. She didn't answer and this seemed to alert Moody and a few other seasoned members to note that something about the Longbottoms changing their secret keeper was not right. Why did they need to change keepers when Sirius was Potter's best friend, not Longbottom's? Moody whipped out his wand.

"Is. This. True."

"W-we had no other choice. It was the best thing to do at the time. Sirius was too obvious a choice for the Potters."

"Then what was your reason?" Minerva asked gently, "Why did you change yours to Peter as well?"

A terrifying look passed behind Alice's eyes. She looked around herself as if looking for someone who might leap out and lop off her tongue. She shook her head and burrowed further back into her still silent mother.

"Can't you tell us why, Alice?" Albus asked.

Alice began to cry. She shook and trembled, almost dropping her son as she fell to her knees on the floor. She looked so small and insignificant then. Perhaps if she had curled into a ball they wouldn't notice her.

"Just tell us why you changed your keeper."

"B-Because Sirius told us to."

_x.X.x …I don't mind…falling to pieces… x.X.x_

He was walking down a hall. There were many doors, each with their own name—so many doors. Something told him that whatever was written on the door was what lay behind it. He couldn't see an end in sight. Glancing up at one of the marked doors, he froze.

Dumbledore, Moody, Shacklebolt, Tonks, Lupin…there was a name on every door for every person he knew in life. Lucius, Snape, Wormtail, Bones, Lovegood, Bellatrix, Regulus, Narcissa, Frank, Alice…everyone.

But…there was only one name he was looking for. Only one. Which one was it? He'd know it if he saw it, but right now he couldn't remember who it was. The name was so important but he couldn't even remember why.

James Potter.

That's what the door said.

This was it. This was the door he was looking for. But why? Why was it so important? What was this man to him? His chest hurt, but he couldn't place the feeling. Where did he know this man from? Why did it hurt so much to see this name?

Suddenly, the door went transparent and he could see a small sitting room. A brown-haired, hazel-eyed man with wire-framed glasses was sitting there. He had a book open in his lap—a fire dancing merrily in the grate. The answer hit him like a ton of bricks.

That was James Potter. The boy come man he grew up with. This was his brother, his mother, his lover—his friend. He was just sitting there reading like nothing out of the ordinary was going on. Perhaps there wasn't. He looked so unconcerned…and alive.

Sirius bit his lip and walked closer. He placed his hands over the door's surface lightly. James looked up towards Sirius briefly and frowned. Sirius smiled and waved a little. James just shook his head and went back to reading his book. Why couldn't he see?

And then Voldemort was there.

Sirius was banging on the door—trying to get James's attention. There was no handle to grasp and his hand kept slipping across the smooth expanse. Voldemort was smirking at him in a secretive way—like there was a secret in this morbid scene that Sirius should have known.

But he didn't.

No.

Not him.

…And then there was blood.

Voices were all around him—inside him—accusing and praising. Why did the accusations sound so wrong? He could hear the approving words of his mother—how accusing Dumbledore sounded. Remus was crying and Lily…Lily was crying too.

So much blood…

There was a whisper in his ear. He couldn't understand it, but he knew it was something important. He couldn't hear it though. No matter how hard he listened, it seemed like it didn't matter. All that mattered at that moment was getting James out of there.

Someone was screaming…

**o0o**

"Sirius! Sirius, wake up!"

Said man jerked awake. His screams died down, but someone else was screaming—still crying in his head. Why wouldn't it stop? His chest constricted. Another unidentifiable wave of emotion washed over him.

Harry.

Sirius sat up quickly and shifted through the blankets and sheets he found himself tangled up in. He began to panic when he didn't see Harry straight away. Where was Harry? Where did he put his baby?

"Harry?! Harry—where are you?!"

Ignoring the aches in his body, Sirius leapt up from the bed. There was a woman standing there. She had that same beautiful tuscan-brown skin and raven hair as his cousin Billy. Her face looked vaguely familiar to him, but at that moment, it didn't matter. He had to find his little Harry.

He grasped her shoulders tightly, resisting the urge to shake her, "Harry! Where is my baby?!"

The door clicked open and a harsh rustling sound was heard. It was accompanied by footsteps and a few words of harsh reprimand, but Sirius heard none of it. His hands trembled on the woman's shoulder and for a moment, he thought he felt water under his wounding fingers.

"Sirius, you're tired, you need to rest—" The woman started.

"Where is he?! He's crying! What have you done with him? I can hear him crying—he needs me!"

Billy's voice boomed in the small room, "Sirius! Sirius! Calm down I have him right here."

The older man held Harry out gently, knowing Sirius only had eyes for the boy at the moment. Sirius noted the arms holding Harry, but didn't give them a second thought as he pulled the squalling child to his chest. The man and woman winced at the harsh treatment, but didn't say anything.

"Harry…oh god Harry…I thought I had lost you…"

Falling back to the bed, Sirius buried his face in Harry's waving arms. The baby calmed just as the tension ran from Sirius's frame. The man slumped into the bed like an old rag doll. He looked so broken then. Like someone had leant over and cut loose all of the strings holding him up.

Billy made sure to make no sudden movements as he reached for his wife's hand. He gently tugged her from the room and into the small hallway. He only glanced back as he shut the door softly. Sirius would be fine for a little bit.

"Adsila…" Billy started.

"Don't _asgaya_ …please don't…"

Both Billy and his wife stood in oppressing silence for a few minutes. Billy watched the crescent-shaped marks on his wife's shoulders trickle blood slower and slower—the air drying the thick liquid. Soft words broke the silence.

"He feels so… _nukpana_ …I don't know how to describe it, but he feels very dark."

Billy sighed, "He is upset _agehya_. He just lost everything. The _ashkii_ is all he has left."

Adsila turned her head away and wrapped her arms around herself, "Yes. But you did not see his eyes. This was not the man you introduced me to those years past."

" _Agehya_ …" Billy tried, "He is just a man. He is desperate for the only thing he has left of his friends and family."

"He is not a man!"

"Adsila! You will take that back this instant! What's wrong with you?"

Adsila rubbed her arms harshly, "He has changed _asgaya_. He has become something that even he may not know himself. It is almost like there is a bad _achak_ in his chest."

"Enough Adsila—you will watch him as part of the family. He is family and we will not throw him out on his knees."

"I will watch him _asgaya_. I will watch the little _ashkii_ , but the _askook_ is your responsibility. I do not trust him as you do." She reached out a hand to Billy, but retracted it halfway there, "I cannot trust him as you do."

Before Billy could respond, Adsila walked downstairs—her arms wrapped tightly around her body.

_x.X.x …count me in…violent… x.X.x_

"Give him the vertiserum." Albus sighed, "It is all we can do."

Peter leapt up from his seat but did not attempt to leave the room, "Wait! Please, not that. Not vertiserum. I'll tell you the truth, you have my word!"

"Yes, but my boy, that is exactly what we cannot trust at the moment."

"Then a Wizard's Oath, I cannot break it or I will be killed."

"There are ways to cheat it."

"I-If you give me _vertiserum_ …I'll die! Surely I will!"

"Nonsense, you can't die from a harmless potion." Severus snapped harshly.

The balding man slumped back into his chair, "But you don't understand! There was this spell—we all had to drink this potion—you must believe me!"

Snape looked to the Headmaster who hesitated but shook his head, "Proceed."

Pettigrew took the potion without fighting, making everyone doubt his words. But he was trembling so badly in his seat that they couldn't really dispel his words as lies either.

"Who gave away the Potters' and Longbottoms' location?"

"S-Sirius did…"

"Liar!" Remus shouted, "How are you doing that?! How can you still blame Sirius for this while you're under vertiserum?!"

"Remus, please…" Albus tried.

"No Albus! This can't be right."

"I brewed the damn thing myself Lupin." Severus snarled.

"But still!"

"Why do you say that Sirius did this Peter? Aren't you a deatheater? You have the mark on your arm."

Peter slouched in his seat, his teeth clenching tightly over his betraying tongue, blood began pooling in his mouth before he was forced to speak again, "Because I am not a deatheater."

"What do you mean? The mark is plain as day on your arm."

The man shook his head, "It's not real."

Remus watched in abject horror as Pettigrew scratched deeply at the mark on his arm. He spelled away the remains of the scratches as his fingernails drew a well of red and black. Underneath his fingernails revealed something that they never would have guessed.

There was no mark.

"How did you do that?"

"It wasn't a real mark. It was a muggle type of ink that stains when under the skin. But due to being a wizard, the ink doesn't dry. A needle was used to press it beneath my skin, but not deep enough that I couldn't remove it."

"Why would you need to remove it?"

"So that when the deed was done, I could go home and scratch it off my arm. The blame wouldn't be on me then."

"Are you saying that this whole thing was a set-up? What was the whole plan?"

"The deatheaters, once the position was revealed, were supposed to go to-to the location only to seek and render helpless. Their orders were not to kill, but only harm. They were sup-posed to…supposed t-to…"

Peter trailed off and his eyes glazed over. A light sheen of sweat covered his face that had twisted into fear. Remus walked over to his old friend and shook him slightly by his shoulder. When he didn't respond Lupin tried again.

"Peter…?"

A hand shot out to grab Remus by his shirt. He cried out and tried to pull away but the grip on his shirt was too strong. The Aurors trained their wands on the man but he still did not let go. Instead he leaned forward and spoke no louder than a whisper.

"I-It's starting…"

Lupin leaned in closer to hear the words that were nearly silent at the end. A small gurgling noise was emitted from the back of Pettigrew's throat. Remus frowned and looked between the parted lips at something bubbling at the back of the man's throat.

The werewolf looked over his shoulder at the other occupants in the room. They were all holding their breaths and leaning in to see what had happened. Remus looked back to Peter's face and leaned back in slowly.

A small squeak erupted from the balding man's throat. Remus stared in horror as the bubbling lump in the back of the other man's throat became a rat. He clamped his hands over his mouth and leapt away from Pettigrew's cooling body.

"What mockery is this?!" Someone shouted.

Albus leapt from his seat with a strange look on his face, "This must be some type of new fail-safe Voldemort has created to keep his secrets. Strange, I have never known him to use such a method before."

"Because he doesn't." Snape said in disgust, "He would rather kill them in person. No, this was not done by the Dark Lord."

"Are you suggesting…?" Albus trailed off.

"We'll never know." Snape replied stiffly.

Still, the name Sirius Black hung in the air between them all.

The body tumbled from the chair and crumbled as it toppled to the floor, falling into small pieces of rocks and dust—the dust giving way to a swarm of rats.

Screams and profane exclamations went up and the whole room was in an uproar. Remus ignored them all as he dry heaved on the floor—a rat larger than the rest, sitting calmly by his hand.

Wearing the indelible face of Peter Pettigrew.

_x.X.x …let's begin…feeding the sickness… x.X.x_

Like a flower in a basement, Adsila waned. Ever since she had let Billy's wizard cousin into their home, she had dreams. At first they were small and insignificant, like dreaming about the man with a shadow sitting on his shoulders and around him, which she took to be depression, or the man rubbing at his pale white arms.

Later, the dreams became so much more. The shadows began to take shapes of people—faceless people and his rubbing turned to scratching until his arms bled. He would continue scratching until he reached his bones and then he would look up and call her name.

Adsila didn't like being left alone with Sirius. The _askook_ was so…strange. She knew about the magic of his kinds and the magic of the lands. She even knew the legends and tales like her own two arms. But whatever it was that Billy's cousin was exuding was none of those.

Sometimes, she would go up to his room at night to deliver a tray and she could hear the _askook_ talking to someone. She could even sometimes smell strange scents tainting the air around the room. She usually just knocked and left the food by the door, but whenever she came back, it was always untouched.

It bothered Adsila when the _askook_ didn't eat, because then she knew that the little _ashkii_ didn't eat either. She knew this because the bottle she placed on the tray was always full as she had left it and cold. She tried to tell her husband, but he would never listen. He was too stubborn a man to listen to her.

Adsila stumbled upon the _askook's_ strange mannerisms one night—completely by accident. He had left open the door to his room and she could see clearly inside. This was perhaps the first and last time she had ever seen the askook act like he was the man he used to be.

He lay on the floor as pale as an _achak_ when she appeared. Blood stained his hands and his shirt. The little _ashkii_ lay peacefully on the floor next to him. He was wrapped in some old cloth and was covered in some type of weird writing from what Adsila could see of his face and arms.

The _ashkii_ looked a little different than she could remember, but then again, it could just be her eyes. But somehow, the boy's hair was just a little darker than before and his skin a little more white. Something was drawn on the floor but Adsila never went in any closer to see what it was.

Adsila watched in horror as the _askook's_ venomous stare fixated on her. There was no recognition there—nothing but pure hatred. And not the kind shared with a loved one or a friend. There was nothing loving or friendly in those eyes.

She had dropped the tray and ran.

Billy had gone out for work early that morning leaving Sirius alone with his wife and their kids. He knew Adsila didn't like Sirius all that much, but there was nothing he could do for her. He had to provide for the family and that meant leaving her alone sometimes.

"I will see you around six tonight Adsila," Billy said backing out of the drive, "And please, don't do anything foolish."

"Asgaya…it is not foolish. You know I am right."

Billy didn't reply to her words instead he said, "Agehya…go for a walk and clear your head."

Adsila didn't look back once at the house as she walked away.

Sirius smiled to himself as he lifted Harry into his arms. The last of the note-worthy presences left the premises of the house. He waved a hand at the covered caldron in the corner of his small room. Pushing it towards the middle of the room, Sirius sat down. He gently placed Harry on a small pallet behind him and turned to remove the stasis spell over the pot.

A sweet smelling steam rose from the caldron in front of Sirius. Yes. He was making a potion. This was a very special potion with a very special purpose. Holding his hand over the bubbling caldron, he delicately cut his palm and allowed for some of his blood to drip in. When he deemed it enough, he wrapped a towel around his hand and stirred.

A bottle filled about two-thirds of the way to the top sat next to his station on the floor. Behind him, Harry gurgled and kicked his back. Sirius smiled gently and reached behind himself to tickle the little feet.

"Soon Harry. Soon, no one will be able to take you from me."

Harry giggled in reply.

Sirius ladled some of the potion into the bottle—enough to fill it. He patted the spot next to himself and waited for Harry to crawl his way over. Harry was nearly sixteen months. He needed to teach the boy to walk soon.

In the corner of the room Sirius heard Jacob make some noise in the small makeshift playpen. He looked up to see the boy wide awake and on the verge of tears. He had tossed a toy over the small gate that he, apparently still wanted to play with.

Screwing the nipple on the bottle, Sirius scooped Harry and made his way over just as the sobs began. He sighed and placed Harry down on the floor outside the pen and reached inside to pick up the sobbing boy.

"Shush now, Jacob. If you don't stop, then Harry will start crying too."

He bounced the irritable boy in his arms which, for some reason, caused the boy to cry harder. He tried walking, but the boy's face became redder and redder for reasons the man would never know. Something dark began to bubble in his chest.

Sirius frowned and held Jacob away from himself, "Hush you noisy child! Be silent!"

Jacob let out a particularly loud wail that set Sirius on edge as Harry began to cry as well. The boy still on the floor tugged at Sirius's pant leg trying to get his attention. Sirius swallowed thickly and pushed Harry away with his foot.

"Not right now, Harry. Just be quiet for a minuit."

Harry crawled back towards Sirius and grabbed onto the man's pants again. Again, he tugged with all his might. He was on the verge of pulling himself up until Sirius pushed him aside once again with his foot—a little harder this time.

"I said not right now Harry!" He growled.

The room was flooded with loud wails. It seemed that the louder one got, the other had to get just that much louder. The older man knelt quickly to retrieve the toy Jacob had thrown earlier, but the boy refused to even look at it.

"Shut up! Be quiet!" Sirius begged.

The struggling man placed Jacob on the bed and went to his knees to pull Harry into his body. From the bed, Jacob threw the toy that Sirius had retrieved for him and cried harder. Sirius squeezed Harry tightly.

"Quiet! Be quiet! What do you want from me?! Why can't you just shut up!"

Sirius looked frantically around his room for something—anything that would shut the children up. Dropping Harry to the bed, Sirius stood up. He couldn't take care of crying children. His Harry had never cried like this before. It was beginning to scare him.

His salvation came in the form of a small bottle. It was a small unnoticeable bottle about the size of a man's fist. There was no name on the bottle, but Sirius knew what it was. He'd seen this bottle for many days during the days following James's marriage to Lily.

He quickly grabbed the two bottles on the floor and halved the contents between the two. This would have to do. He was desperate. He could handle Harry, because Harry was his baby. Harry was a part of himself. But he couldn't handle him like this. Harry used to listen, why not now?

Quickly twisting the caps onto the bottles Sirius shoved them into the children's mouths. The crying slowly calmed and Sirius breathed a sigh of relief. He shifted the two up to his pillow as they began to drift off to sleep. He smiled and smoothed Harry's hair from his head. Shooting a spell over the caldron, Sirius leaned down to pick up the bottle he had dropped in his haste and flipped it over in his hand sadly.

Damn…that was the last of his Firewhiskey.

_x.X.x …how do I…simplify… x.X.x_

"Albus! Harry—I know where he is!"

Dumbledore looked up from the thick tome on his desk to see Remus standing in front of his desk with a desperate look in his eye. The man was out of breath and looked a little older than the last time the Headmaster had seen him—a little more wild.

"I beg your pardon?"

Lupin moved forward and placed a photo down on top of the page Dumbledore was reading, "Here see? He was seen in America—Seattle, Washington."

The Headmaster picked up the quickly snapped photo. It was magical which means that someone magical had spotted the boy. He was so small and skinny—just sitting on a bench outside of a bookstore. Dumbledore squinted his eyes and peered harder at the boy.

The Harry in the picture wore big clothing. They were modified to fit the boy, but was still big enough to hide the dark marks on his arms. He looked so much different than what Dumbledore anticipated. His hair was much more tame and dark—his skin, so much more paler.

"Quickly," Dumbledore murmured, "We must call an Order meeting."

Lupin rushed from the office to do as told, leaving Dumbledore to himself. The old man sighed and continued to watch the boy in the photograph. Harry scratched his shoulder lightly and swung his legs to and fro. He was too small to reach the ground.

The boy in the picture yawned and lay down on the bench. The people in the background just walked past the bench and around it—like it wasn't there. Albus stared harder at the photo, looking for any sign of Sirius Black. He knew, without doubt, that Sirius would not have abandoned the boy just like that.

A small glint caught his eye as Harry sat back up. It was small and hard to tell what it was from the distance, but Albus knew that design anywhere. Any Pureblood would know that design. The Black Family ring was laced around his neck.

"Albus?"

Hearing his name, the Headmaster looked up to see his Headmistress and a few of the trustworthy members of the Order standing by his desk. It looked like Remus only called the most significant of them. It was good on his part since Albus never did specify who he wanted to see without alerting the rest of the Wizarding Community.

This left only Minerva McGonagall, Severus Snape, Alice Longbottom, Kingsley Shacklebolt, Alistor Moody, Remus Lupin, and himself. Everyone else either worked too entrenched in the Ministry or too close in the public eye.

"Ah good, you're all here. I have been brought some rather interesting news." He gestured and comfortable chairs sprung up, "Please, have a seat."

Everyone took their seats mumbling, whispering and or, in Severus' case: grumbling. It seems that out of everyone, he was he only one who didn't want to be in the room. No surprise there. The ancient wizard chuckled looked back down at the photo to see that Harry had tucked the ring back out of sight.

Smart boy.

"Well, what is it Albus?" Minerva said, getting to the point, "We can only leave our classes unattended for so long."

"Yes, of course." Dumbledore smiled tightly, "Today I have been approached with the whereabouts of Sirius Black and his godson, Harry Potter."

The room was so silent it was probably not too farfetched to say that one could hear a pin drop on the other side of the school. It was just that quiet. Looks of shock and disbelief ran over the scattered faces.

"Is…is this true Professor?" Alice whispered, "You're not playing a joke on us, are you?"

Dumbledore smiled at the woman gently, "I play no games Mrs. Longbottom."

"Then are you sure Albus?" Minerva asked quickly, "Can we so easily trust this source?"

"I'm sure." The old wizard said with conviction.

"How do you know they did not just take a photo of some random child that fits the description? I mean, it isn't exactly that hard to find a child of that description." Moody huffed.

"No," Albus chuckled, "I daresay it isn't."

"Then how…?" Alice drifted off as she was handed the photo Remus had brought in earlier. She frowned as she passed the photo on, "Are you sure this is the boy Professor?"

"Yes, I'm sure. Why do you think it isn't him?"

"Because," Snape spoke, "This boy looks nothing like Potter. He looks like Black."

Remus took the photo, "No. Sirius and James looked so much alike that they could pass off as brothers. This is James' son." But even as he said it, Remus knew he was lying to convince himself, "This is James' son."

"Then a glamour perhaps?" McGonagall suggested.

Moody grabbed the picture and shook his head—slapping the image back on the Headmaster's desk, "No. No glamour."

Alice Longbottom frowned. There was just something not right about the child in that picture. Even Severus knew something was off about the boy because the snarky man had voiced and pointed out her same suspicions when he didn't even like the boy.

The female Auror turned back to the conversation just as Dumbledore began to spell out their plans. Because, of course, if Harry was where this source said he would be, then Sirius would not be that far away. After all, by the way Sirius had acted on the day the Potters died was any indication, he wouldn't give the boy up without a fight.

"…we will transport Harry—only Harry. If Sirius is anything like he used to be, he will surly follow—without fail."

_x.X.x …dislocate…the enemy's on the way… x.X.x_

Sirius rinsed the last bit of the soap from Harry's newly tamed hair. The boy just giggled and splashed around in the tub a bit. Tomorrow will be the first time since they had arrived at the reservation that Sirius would let his son out past the bedroom doors besides the bath.

Harry just played with the bubbles in the tub as Sirius washed up behind him. When the older man got out, Harry stood and held up his arms. His mother had already wrapped a towel around himself and was quickly grabbing another.

Harry, being such a quiet and simple boy didn't understand why Jacob told him that his mommy looked different from Jacob's mommy. Sirius had pretty hair, it was shorter than Jacob's mommy's hair, but it was still pretty and nice to touch.

His mommy was pretty too, he had pretty red lips and a nice smile. His eyes were pretty and grey. He never saw anybody with those color eyes before. Harry didn't understand, so like usual, he asked.

"Mommy?"

"Hm?" Sirius scooped Harry from the tub and sat him on the counter.

"Are you different? Jacob said that you can't be my mommy cuz you look like his daddy."

Sirius hesitated before he emptied the tub and turned back to Harry, "I am different Harry. But not like Jacob said. I'm different because I am your mommy…and I am your daddy too."

"But they say only mommies can has babies."

"Well, you did come from mommy's tummy. I remember it so well. You were so precious to me. You still are." Sirius began to rub Harry dry.

"Then why did Jacob say you are different?"

Sirius rubbed harder, "Just ignore him. He doesn't know anything. I am your mother and that's the end of it. You hear me?"

"You're hurting me…" Harry whimpered and nodded, "O-okay mommy."

"You will never bring this up in my presence again! One would think you don't love me. But you love me, don't you Harry? You love me, right?"

"O-of course mommy…"

"And you know I love you right?" Sirius stopped rubbing and hugged Harry tightly, "I've told you so many times, no one else in this world will love you because of what you are. But you will always have me. No one loves you as much as I do."

Sirius looked into the mirror over Harry's head—his Harry's head and caught sight of his reflection. He looked so much better after he was cleaned and little rested, even if not by much. He was till thin and looked as if he was going through a withdrawal of some sort.

Desperation and fear lined the edges of his eyes and mouth. And even as he clung to Harry, he could feel his life draining away slowly. It felt like a leech sat there on his chest, sucking little by little every day, leaving barely enough life for him to stand.

"I k-know mommy, I'm s-sorry…" Harry sobbed lightly, "I k-know you love me…o-only you…"

Sirius held onto Harry all the more tighter. He pulled the naked boy into his arms and carried him to their bedroom. He dressed the boy in his pajama shirt and sent him to sleep. Sirius dressed himself in his pajama pants and crawled in next to his son.

He held Harry while they slept.

If Sirius Black was in his right mind then, he would probably too you he was afraid. He was afraid to lose his Harry. He was afraid to lose his baby's love and adoration. He was afraid of losing everything he had left...

But why…of course, he still had yet to figure that part out.

_x.X.x …show me what it's like… x.X.x_

She couldn't do it anymore. She couldn't. She loved her _honiahak_ a; she loved Harry; she loved Billy, but she couldn't stand it anymore. There was something wrong with her husband's cousin. Billy might not want to see it, but she did.

Her friend had divorced her husband and left—asking Adsila to come with her. She turned it down—she couldn't take Jacob away from his father. But now…she had to take Renee's advice and get out. There was nothing left for her here. Renee said that she would even take her and Jacob in for a while.

Adsila sighed deeply and tried to keep her breathing pattern as normal as possible. She curled her arms tighter around her honiahaka and rolled him to the center of the bed. Jacob had taken to sleeping in his parent's bed since Sirius and Harry had his old room. She felt Billy leave the bed and get ready for the day. She opened her eyes as he disappeared into the bathroom and stared ahead at the wall in front of her.

Billy fumbled about the room and briefly stopped next to her on the bed. He didn't reach out to her or kiss her as he usually would do, but instead he sighed, grabbed his keys and left the room. Adsila choked back her tears and burrowed further into her quilts and her son.

Once the sound of the old truck filtered down the road, Adsila got up and began to get dressed. Nudging her honiahaka awake, she tossed some clothes into an overnight bag and slung it over her shoulders. Pulling out some paper and a pen, Adsila dredged up some courage and quickly penned a letter to Billy with a shaky hand.

Jacob yawned and leaned into his mother, causing her to jolt and shoot scared looks towards the empty doorway. The door to Sirius's room was still close tightly.

"My _honiahaka_ …You know we're going out today, right?"

Jacob nodded and yawned again, "Yea…but why can't Harwy and Sirius go?"

She swallowed thickly, "Because our little _gaagii_ is sick, remember? Sirius has to get him better before he can come with us."

Jacob accepted the answer without question.

Adsila's hands trembled as she folded the paper and placed it on the dresser. She looked over the room and made sure that she had everything before picking up her bag. She prodded Jacob to the door and took his hand. In the other room, Harry could be heard crying, so she assumed she could get away without Sirius noticing.

How wrong she was.

"Where are you going?"

"Sirius! Oh, I was uh…going to the kitchen to get…something."

"With that bag…and your son?" A malicious glint sprung to his eyes, "You were leaving—weren't you?!"

"What are you talking about? I'm not going anywhere."

Sirius pointed at her accusingly, "You were! You have a bag and everything! You were leaving! Where were you going to go Adsila?"

"Nowhere! We were just going out for a while!"

"Liar! That's not good enough!"

With a speed that Adsila would never have anticipated, Sirius lunged at her. She wrestled with him for a bit—shoving Jacob to the side before Sirius forcefully shoved her into the corner of the small table she had in the hall. Her vision blackened for a split second, but that was all the opening Sirius needed. He grasped tightly to her ankles and began to tug her back towards the bedroom.

"Uncle Sirius, stop! Your hurting mommy!" Jacob cried.

"No. Of course not Jake…your mum just needs to be punished. She's been very bad."

"No!" Jacob screamed, "No!"

Sirius snarled and kicked Jacob backwards into his parent's room—the door locking with a quickly murmured spell.

"S-stop it…" Adsila mumbled—disoriented.

Sirius tsked, "You should know better than to do something like this Adsila, what would Billy say?"

His words seemed to trigger some unknown well of energy in Adsila for she kicked Sirius's tightly gripping hands away and pushed herself from the floor—making a break for the stairs. Sirius jerked out a hand to grab her shirt, but instead, with malicious thoughts in his head…he pushed her.

There was a sickening crack as she hit the bottom.

Sirius froze. He tip-toed his way to the edge of the staircase and looked down the short flight. She had landed on her head. The impact, even at that distance, was enough to snap her neck. Blood was pooling on the floor…and slowly…the guilt and fear began to kick in.

Rushing down the steps, Sirius knelt down next to Adsila's unmoving body. Gently brushing a hand to her neck, he choked up as he felt no pulse. He looked around the room and began to panic. He hadn't felt this feeling in so long that it felt foreign.

"Adsila…Adsila! Get up! Get off the floor—stop laying like that!"

He hadn't meant to kill her. He had only meant to push her a little. He wanted her to stumble. He didn't even want for her to go forward, he had intended on pulling her back. Sirius didn't want her to leave Billy like his parents had left him…like the Potters had left him.

Oh god…now she was dead. His hands began to tremble. What would he do? How could he fix this? No amount of magic in all the world could bring her back to life. Sirius brought his fingers to his lips and began to gnaw on his fingernails.

Blood was steadily dripping from his lips and hand as he thought—having bitten through to the quick. He had to get rid of the body. He had magic. He could make it look like an accident. Just like _him_. He could make her look just like _him_.

It was an accident.

He never meant for her to die.

"Mommy…?"

Sirius's head snapped up. There. At the top of the stairs…was Harry. His wild eyes searched for something—anything to explain. Nothing came to him. It didn't matter. It shouldn't. Harry was a child. He wouldn't understand. He just did what he was told and that was it.

"Harry…" His voice cracked.

Harry climbed halfway down the steps but stopped at the warning look his mother sent him, "Is Anty Addie okay?"

"Of course she is!" Sirius snapped. Harry flinched and Sirius tried to calm his labored breathing. Speaking more gently, he said, "I need you to clean this up. Adsila left quite a mess and I don't want Billy to get mad when he comes home."

Harry moved slowly down the stairs, only moving quicker when his mother snapped at him to move faster. He got old rags that could be thrown away and never missed, gloves cleaning solutions and a pail of water. He began cleaning without a word. Sirius smiled a bit to himself. That was the good thing about Harry.

He never questioned Sirius.

Never.

Quickly gathering his supplies, Sirius dragged the body from the room. He dumped Adsila into her car and proceeded to situate her body in a driving position. Once this was done, he shut the door and examined his handiwork. Something was off.

Opening the door, he gently brushed his fingers though her long black hair. He cleaned her shirt with a little spell here and there and even straightened a bit inside the car. After a minute of debating with himself, Sirius buckled her safety belt.

"I'm so sorry James. I'm so sorry. It was an accident. I never meant for you to be in it. But it had to look just like an accident."

Sirius slammed the door and scratched at his arms.

_x.X.x … to dream in black and white… x.X.x_

He was there—standing over by the shelves for the darker and more permanent Charms books. He was crouched over a book that was lying open on the floor in front of him. It looked like a fairly harmless children's book because even from that short distance, the Auror could make out the flashes and sparkling dust occasionally spouting from the book.

Alice swallowed—hard. The photo album—disguised book she held in her hand continuously slipped down her sweaty fingers making it almost impossible to keep a firm grip on it. Just put the book in his hand. Or put it in a place where only he would see it. That's all she had to do.

But it felt impossible.

Why did it have to be her? Out of everyone in the Order—one filled with Aurors and spies far more skilled than herself—she had been chosen. Was it because Lily had been her best friend? It had to be. There was nothing else. Still, she would admit, that she wanted to see Harry—her friend's baby. Her son's birthday mate.

Just a little bit.

Using all the will power she had left, Alice Longbottom moved to sit in the children's book area. She took a deep breath and noisily flipped through the book she held. She dropped it as she flipped too roughly through the pages.

The noise of the book hitting the floor caught Harry's attention. Alice ignored him for the moment and went to pick up the book with trembling hands. Lily was her best friend. They had gone into labor together and she'd be damned if little Harry looked just like his parents.

"Are you okay?"

Alice started and peered down into the little face that butted into her vision. He looked just like his parents. Her eyes got a little misty before she forced them to clear. There was something a little off in his complexion and he was a bit blurred around the edges, but Alice didn't think too much on this. She smiled.

"You look just like your mother."

Harry frowned and stood straight and as tall as he could, "Mommy told—" He took a breath here, "…told me not to talking to strangors."

Alice let the smile fall from her face. Harry was four. His mother never lived long enough to…unless…unless Sirius had built them a life here. It wasn't so strange when she thought about it. Sirius had to get married and settle down sometime.

"I'm not a stranger. I knew you since you were this small," She held up her hands to emphasize how small he was.

"Nuh-un, I wasn't never dat small." Harry pouted.

Alice had to bite her lip from laughing at Harry's cute drawl. His mother must have been a British woman or had an accent of some sort, because even now, it wasn't hard to tell that Harry wasn't an American-born child.

"Of course you were." She chuckled. In fact, Harry was still small. Small and skinny. Neville was six going on seven—the same as Harry and yet he was still bigger. Was he being taken care of alright?

"Where are your parents?" The older woman looked around cautiously.

Harry shrugged, "I 'unno. Wreading a book, prolly."

"And they left you here alone? By yourself?"

"I won' go nowhere. Mommy told me not to."

The female Auror pushed these thoughts into the back of her head. This is why she was here. She would give him the book and let it activate. She swallowed thickly and pressed the book into the small hands.

"Wha's dis for?" Harry eyed the book suspiciously—looking ready to drop it.

"It's a book I want you to read. It has a lot of nice pictures and stuff. It's…" Alice racked her brain for something, "It's magical."

Harry gasped excitedly and looked at the book with more openness, "Really?"

"Yes." Alice knelt down by Harry, "But you mustn't tell anyone about this book, okay?"

"Not even my mommy?" Alice shook her head, "Why not?" Harry glanced at her briefly as he flipped through the pages.

"Well…it's special. It was made only for you." Alice grabbed Harry's small hands, "Promise me that you won't tell anyone. Not even your parents."

Harry seemed to search the Auror's face for a moment before he turned back to the book, "Okay. I won' tell mommy."

"Good boy." Alice ruffled Harry's hair. It was so much softer than she imagined it to be. She thought it would be thicker, more like James.

The small boy shot a smile her way before he dragged the book over to where Alice saw him standing earlier.

"Mommy…?"

Sirius hummed. He didn't turn around to face Harry as he continued to search the bookshelf in front of him. He lowered a hand to the top of Harry's unruly head to let the boy know that he was listening.

Harry shifted uncomfortably under the touch and Sirius frowned. He tightened his grip in Harry's hair and tugged gently, "What is it Harry?"

"I got a book…"

"Okay, that's nice."

"I has a qestion."

"Fire away."

Sirius flipped over the thin book he held in his hands, shook his head and placed it back on the shelf. He sighed and looked down to see what book had his boy so interested. Usually Harry was never this calm whenever they came out book shopping. Looking down with a smile—Sirius bit his tongue.

Rage and sadness filled his veins as he felt Harry's innocent gaze on his person.

"Mommy…who is James?"

_x.X.x …so I can leave this world…tonight… x.X.x_

x.X.x

**TBC**

x.X.x

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N:**
> 
>  
> 
> If I got something wrong, please don't hesitate to tell me—other than my warnings of course. But really, I am only relative to the Colorado Navajo Reserves as we passed through there before moving on, and I'm not too sure I got some of the other words correct. Thanks.
> 
> Lexicon:
> 
> Word//Tribe//Meaning
> 
> ASHKII: Navajo: "boy"
> 
> ADSILA: Cherokee: "blossom"
> 
> ASGAYA: Cherokee: "man"
> 
> AGEHYA: Cherokee: "woman"
> 
> ASKOOK: Algonquin: "snake"
> 
> SHIRIKI: Pawnee: "coyote"
> 
> ACHAK: Algonquin: "spirit."
> 
> HONIAHAKA: Cheyenne: "little wolf."
> 
> GAAGII: Navajo: "raven."


	3. Interlude: Lies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Character death.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Sorry this is so late. I remember someone asking about Adsila's death and the reactions of the family. This was originally part of the original chapter, but I cut it for this interlude. The funeral will be in the next chapter.**

**x.X.x**

_Interlude: Lies_

**x.X.x**

* * *

**x.X.x** _…_ _Bound at every limb by my shackles of fear…_ **x.X.x**

He was upset. He was scared. He was…angry. He was very, very angry. If asked, even he couldn't tell you exactly where the anger had come from. Perhaps it was because he didn't understand…didn't _want_ to understand.

The unfairness of it all just swept over his head. He had only left his home for less than five hours and here he was again: approximately fifty yards from his home and close to tears-drowning in a despair he had not felt since he was a boy. It was a feeling he'd thought he'd never feel again.

But here it was.

Billy wasn't even sure he had heard them right. It was practically impossible because it was only just this morning that he had seen her. She was upset, to be sure, but she wasn't _that_ upset. His wife…his sweet, mild tempered Adsila…was dead.

"Charlie…I…"

His best friend was the one who had brought him the news. He was also the only officer who had not left his side…yet. "We found the Rabbit, Billy. There was no mistaking it."

"But she…she was just…"

Charlie rested his hand on Billy's shoulder and propelled the other man towards his car. They were at the scene of the crime, but to Billy, it looked everything but. For all the reports made, it simply looked as if his wife had parked her car and went to sleep…and for all intents and purposes, she just didn't feel like waking up.

In fact, Billy would have believed it had it not been for the few extra claims Officer Swan had made to him. She had been struck. Either by a floor or a weapon of some sort—it did not matter. But according to Charlie, she might have already been dying or already dead before they had found her.

It may very well have been a wizard…one of those people chasing Sirius and his son. But what would they have achieved from this? What could his wife had known that they couldn't just take and leave her alive and well? It's not like they would go and hunt them down for it. It could also have been an accident. A pure accident. She could have been on her way to the hospital.

But somehow…he couldn't bring himself to believe that. Not when…

The thought ran Billy's blood cold.

…her car was facing the wrong direction.

**x.X.x**  
 _…Sealed with lies through so many tears…_  
 **x.X.x**  


A familiar old beat up red truck sat in front of the house when Sirius made it back. The gravity of the whole situation hadn't sunk in yet and he still doubted that his boy wasn't inside Billy's house with Jacob, waiting for him to come back.

Thoughts raged around in his head about what he should tell his old cousin. For one, he made sure there was no evidence of his wife's death in the house…but there was no evidence of what she was doing other than leaving the house that day either. The dark haired man looked down at his hand—his empty hand—where now, only a bloodied necklace occupied the place where Harry's tiny fingers should be.

Harry was gone and Sirius had not nearly enough magic to go and get him back. It would take forever to apperate from one place to another, and by the time he had accumulated enough magic to do so, the other half would have probably drained back into the earth by then and couldn't be used. That thought didn't comfort him.

Billy sat quietly at the small kitchen table staring at the chipped and a little uneven surface. He didn't say anything to Sirius as the other man took a seat across from him. One of Billy's friends—Officer Swan—sat next to him feeling as ragged as Sirius looked, probably. He hid his bloodied hands in his pocket.

Officer Swan reminded Sirius so much of someone he once knew. They both had the same weary chocolate brown eyes and tiredly drawn face. Of course, the man Sirius knew never looked so tired until they were at the end of their road. He promised himself he wouldn't think about it, but the police had unknowingly caused those old flood gates to open. He curled his fingers around the necklace in his pocket.

Rubbing a hand down his face, Billy sighed. No tears, no choked sobs, no nothing. Perhaps it didn't sink in as much as he thought it had. But that couldn't be it—then again Sirius and Charlie weren't crying either. Maybe it was a man thing. But…It just wasn't fair. This just didn't seem right. He had only seen his wife just that morning…

"Sirius…my wife…she…"

"I know."

The Quileute's eyes snapped up to stare at the ruffled top of his cousin's head, "You know." He repeated.

"She…" Sirius shook his head, "I saw the car."

The men sat in the oppressing quiet.

Billy's cracking voice broke the silence, "How is he?"

"Jacob's asleep now." Charlie answered calmly, "He doesn't remember what happened. He said he was in your room."

"I just don't understand it. She…she…" Billy buried his head in his hands, "What will the girls think?"

Sirius stared expressionlessly at the top of Billy's head. He morphed his face into a mask as he spoke his next words slowly, "She died a good death. If it weren't for her, Harry would be in an unsafe place right now."

Billy frowned, "Where is the little _ashkii_ anyway? I haven't seen him at all today."

The grey-eyed man sat silently and stared at Billy. He didn't meet the man's eyes, but he still searched every part of the man's face. He let his eyes flow from the Quileute's face and stare at the wall over the man's left shoulder—the opposite side of where Officer Swan sat. For some reason, those eyes unnerved him. He felt like those weary eyes could see right through him.

"They came and took him, Billy. They slipped him a book and…and James's name was the activation key…" Sirius swallowed against the lump in his throat, "Your wife…your wife went after him."

It took a moment for his own words to register in his own head.

  
**x.X.x**   
_…Lost from within, pursuing the end…_   
**x.X.x**   


Sirius leaned over the table and buried his face in his hands. Even though he wasn't crying out loud, Billy knew that the other man took this really hard. Not so long ago, he'd lost his friends and his entire life collapsed. How it must hurt to have saved their son only to have him taken away with death involved. He didn't even know if Harry was alive.

Billy blinked. "Cousin, your hands…"

He knew. Sirius knew that there was blood on them. Both crusted from Alice and new from where his nails dug into his palm. He also knew that there was black ink on his palm. There was too much red to discern between the two, but it was still there.

The rugged man ignored Billy's plea. He couldn't look at the Quileute man now. He heard only a few whispered words before a light touch made him start. Officer Swan was standing next to his chair with a sad look upon his face. There was nothing this man could do and yet…

"Let me help you."

Had sorrow been inhuman, surely Sirius would have died.

It hadn't escaped him that it wasn't Billy offering to help him.

  
**x.X.x**   
_…I fight for the chance to be lied to again…_   
**x.X.x**   


Billy slowly stood and walked steadily to his room where his son lay unmoving on the bed. It wasn't that he didn't want to…but he didn't think he had it in him at that moment to help his cousin. Perhaps survivor's guilt was eating at him…Or maybe it was the blame game. It _was_ , after all, Sirius's fault that Adsila was upset in the first place.

He ran his fingers through his son's hair and down his face. He had a lot of his mother in him, from her _achak_ to her face. Leaning down, he pulled his son into his arms. He sat cross legged on the bed and cradled the boy like had when Jacob was just a baby.

He was still small enough to fit.

Billy sighed and buried his face in his son's hair. He wondered how he was going to explain Harry's absence and very briefly, he wondered what was going to happen now. His mind wandered to Sirius's bloodied hands and the black ink that stained them. Perhaps there was something there to tell him.

Jacob stirred a little. He recognized instantly the arms that held him, " _Noshi_? Where is mother?"

His father didn't answer him immediately and Jacob knew something was wrong. He remembered very vaguely his Uncle Sirius and his mother arguing and how his Uncle had pushed him into a room after his mother had fallen in the hall. Everything was blank after that—he couldn't remember.

" _Nosh_?"

"Oh my _shiye_ …" Billy whispered gently, "My little _honiahaka_ …we can no longer say her name."

**x.X.x**

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N:**
> 
>  
> 
> This has actually been sitting in edit mode for a while. Which is strange. Weird. Inconceivable. 
> 
> ...Awkward.

**Author's Note:**

>  **A/N:** I know, I know. I shouldn't start something new with Silent Witness out but I was feeling kind of put out with that one. I'm currently facing a block and don't know where to go with chapter four. It's weird because I have half of chapter four, but already I have five completely done.
> 
> Ah, anyway. I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I had this story running around my head for the better part of the month and finally decided to write it down. While I was surfing FFN, I came across AbNaGbEyL's profile and stumbled across her "Harry Black" challenge.
> 
> I decided that even though I was going to write before I found it, the credit all goes to her for that challenge actually encouraged me to post. You guys should go check it out of you have time. I might choose a few of her other challenges as well. They're really good for if you're in a rut.


End file.
